Paderborn, Germany
— Photos by ML
I am one week into a two-week training and conference trip to Germany, and I thought it was time to share a few observations. But before I continue, you should know that if you're looking for an insightful tips-n-tricks article for traveling to Germany, please stop reading now.
[don't worry, I will wait while you type in a new URL and/or click on a different link]
Now, one more warning: the opinions expressed in this post are highly subjective (it's my blog, dammit!), poorly researched (if at all), and most likely affected by high levels of caffeine (at least 3 cups of espresso just today).
I should also mention that I'm neither a lawyer, nor a doctor (I don't even play one on TV), and nothing in this post should be construed as a recommendation, incitement (to riots or otherwise). In fact, I hereby declare no knowledge of having written any of this, said anything even remotely related to this topic, ever! And if I did, I don't remember having done so.
So, with all these disclaimers in place, let's get on with it ... Germany, what can one say? Hm ... clean, efficient, hearty, lots of fun :) The land of Oktoberfest and autobahn. A country where grown men can wear lederhosen in public, and where a feather in your hat is just that: a feather.
This is now the umpteenth time that I come here to Paderborn, Germany. Actually, it's only the 4th time, but who's counting? I have decided to share with you, my dear reader, some hard-won and some stumbled-upon lessons, so that you (yes, you!), should you decide to also come and visit this metropolis, are armed with an encyclopedic wealth of knowledge and ready for any eventuality.
Lesson #1 — Paderborn has tons of history
Sure, pretty much every place in Europe has tons of history. But I thought the fact that they do have history that goes way back even before the American Revolution (yes, the really old one), and the fact that they try to rub it in every chance they hear I'm an American, I figured it's probably worth mentioning. So here it goes: there is tons of history and old stuff in this town and you can read all about it on wikipedia :P
Lesson #2 — Paderborn is closed on Sundays
Yep. It's a fact that I learned today, a sunny Sunday in early September. I thought I'd just take a stroll through town, have a leisurely late breakfast at one of the gazillion bakeries, and then spend some time shopping for gifts (can't go home to the States empty-handed). But, as a confused and slightly agitated — coz I thought he was bs:ing me ;) — German gentleman explained to me: nobody works on Sundays. I also think that my instinctive reaction, best described as "dude, are you serious" (no, don't worry, I didn't say it out loud), may have affected the tone of our conversation. Just kidding, I was very nice and polite ... coz I got me some edumacation ;)
In fairness, some of the million coffee shops (different from the bakeries) do open apparently around noon-ish or so, as do a few fast food joints. But that's not what I was looking for, so as a tourist willing to pay the highly inflated prices (in Euros no less) for coffee and some "brötchen", I was, shall we say, slightly disappointed in the apparent lack of service ... heck, I was hungry and in desperate need of caffeine. Luckily, my now official "home-away-from-home" when I'm in Paderborn, the Artusa Eis Cafe saved my life with a great cappuccino and apfelstrudel and ice cream (breakfast of champions).
Lesson #3 — on the autobahn they drive as if the car was stolen
So I'm cruising along the autobahn at the leisurly pace of 160km/h (that's 100mph for us non-metric people). I should add that I was driving a small Matchbox-sized car with wheels only slightly bigger than those on hopping carts, ad the little thing was starting to shake around 140km/h. Anyway, as I was sayin' ... I'm cruising at what on the New Jersey Turnpike would be a definite-ticket-level speed, and these Audis and BMWs and Porsches and other German automobiles fly by as if I was standing still. I guess the real lesson here is: get a "real" car next time so you can go fast too. Oh, as a side note: driving stick shift is fun, and if you don't know how to, and you're going to rent a car here, you better learn. They do have automatics, but, not as many.
Lesson #4 &mdash German TV has German voice-overs
So you're ready to relax in your hotel room with some TV ... you even recognize some of the shows like 24 etc. But something is amiss. Jack Bauer is speaking German! Huh!? Yep, as far as I can tell, pretty much everything except BBC is in German. Not with subtitles, but with actual voice-overs.
That's it for now!
